Chapter 87

Chapter 87. Nothing Good Comes From Provoking Him

“Ah... my life... haa....”

It was deep into the night.

Actually, it was already so late that the moon should have gone down and the sun should have been rising soon.

I sat alone on a bench with no one nearby, staring blankly into space as I stayed up through the entire night.

I had been sitting here for hours, watching countless people pass by while quietly wrestling with my thoughts, which felt as though someone had deliberately taken the time to turn them into a complete mess today.

“Eat something delicious and cheer up!”

“...I literally just came back from eating something delicious.”

Some people had noticed me sitting in the same spot for hours without moving and stared at me like something terrible had happened.

A few overly concerned people had even sat beside me and offered life advice or words of comfort.

But honestly, none of what they said really had anything to do with me.

This whole experience was irritating in more ways than one.

The food had been pretty damn good, though.

Still, the more I thought about everything, the more annoyed I became.

I had gone out today because I wanted to forget the past.

Instead, today had somehow chained me even tighter to it.

There was only one difference.

My past was no longer simply a painful memory I wanted to forget.

Now it had become something strange enough to make me wonder if I had somehow been brainwashed.

[Will you give up?]

And ever since I walked out of that ridiculously expensive restaurant, this message had been following me around nonstop.

I still hadn't made any decision, so I had been staring at this maddening message for hours.

If I had to look at it much longer, I felt like I might actually pass out.

Give up? Give up on what...?

Was it appearing because I decided I should stop playing that game?

Because I thought about throwing everything away and running overseas?

Because I considered shutting my mouth, investing the money I already had somehow, and living like some nouveau riche bastard for the rest of my life?

What?

What did I do?

What exactly was I supposed to be giving up?

At least tell me what you're asking!

What the hell was I supposed to do?

If I kept playing the game, the Chairman's face kept appearing in my head.

But now, whenever I thought about the Chairman, my past came along with him.

“It's not like I'm the protagonist of some movie... Wait. At this point, maybe I should think of myself as one... Wow. Somehow, that's even scarier.”

There was an enormous gap between the Chairman and me.

A gap too large to cross.

Trying to take revenge on him wasn't exactly realistic.

He was someone who lived in a completely different world from me.

The money that had made my current life comfortable?

The Chairman had handed it over without hesitation.

My current way of life?

The Chairman had created it.

Even the game I was enjoying right now had been created by him.

And without that game, I never would have learned something as unreal as the Flow.

That bastard had contributed an absurd amount to this miserable life of mine.

At this point, I was practically his puppet.

So what the hell could I even do?

And if I did something that went against the Chairman's will, who could guarantee that something straight out of a noir movie wouldn't happen to me?

Maybe I'd get stuffed into a barrel and set some Guinness World Record for eating the most concrete.

“Huh? You've been here all day?”

It was the junior trainer.

We had met last night, and now I was meeting her again in the early morning.

Could this person also be one of the Chairman's chess pieces without even realizing it?

Was that why she kept looking after a weird, pathetic human being like me?

Normally, friendships required people to at least understand each other somewhat.

She wasn't even getting paid.

Why would she keep dealing with me out of pure loyalty?

If I ended up becoming too attached to the junior trainer, would the Chairman step in and erase her too?

Or since he had said his plan had failed, did it no longer matter what happened now?

“Are you okay? You look sick.”

Where did the Chairman's plan begin?

And where did it end?

Was that plan still ongoing even now?

Were there other victims besides me?

He had said everyone else died, but was that really true?

What was the Chairman even trying to accomplish by doing all this?

Why had he been trying to create people similar to Ruin?

Was he trying to turn them into some kind of vessel?

Maybe he wanted to make them role-play like in a TRPG.

Had he wanted to see someone who looked exactly like Ruin enter the game, gain the same powers as Ruin, and destroy the world all over again?

“...Did he pass out?”

Now I was scared.

Only now was I truly scared.

Terrified.

I was finally starting to understand the fear of realizing you were living in someone else's palm.

No matter what I did...

No matter what I thought...

No matter what choice I made...

If everything I did was nothing more than some little performance inside the palm of someone watching me from above, then both fear and emptiness came rushing in at once.

...If I prayed to God right now, maybe I'd actually get an answer.

Maybe I'd even find some peace of mind.

My empathy wasn't exactly the best, so my prayer would probably be selfish as hell.

Still, if God was really God, maybe he'd cut me some slack and listen.

At least in reality, unlike inside a game, I hadn't committed any ridiculously terrible sins.

“Hello~? Junior~? Ingwang~? Kim Ingwang~?”

God, please tell me.

Did my parents really die in a simple accident?

Even the final words they left me...

Were those also something the Chairman intended?

Did the child of the couple who took me in die because I had been accepted into their home?

Or did their child die specifically so I could be accepted into that home?

Or...

Was it all just coincidence?

That day at school, when I was unusually excited and played pranks even though I normally never did anything like that...

Did the Chairman drug me or something?

Or had I simply been happy for the first time and played around like an ordinary child?

...Now that I really thought about it, God didn't seem like the kind of being who was particularly friendly toward humans.

Even if He was, that kindness was probably something completely different from what humans imagined kindness to be.

“Ingwang? I called Lowell. That's okay, right?”

“...Pie?”

“Huh? Pie? Ah, yeah. The math thing, right? Pi. The circle ratio.”

“How do you know her phone number?”

“Oh, she told me to contact her if something happened to you. It did seem a little strange, but... she fell in love with you at first sight, right?”

“...Hmm....”

“Look at you getting embarrassed. She'll be here soon.”

Ahem.

Could it be that even the reason I locked myself inside my house and did nothing but play games...

And naturally came across the recruitment notice for World Gate's beta test...

And suddenly felt the urge to apply for something like that...

Was all of it also the Chairman's doing?

Was that why he had approached me more than the others?

Then what about Pie?

Had I met Pie because of the Chairman's intentions too?

Pie genuinely having good feelings toward me was one thing.

But had the reason she spoke so harshly to me been the difference between emotions that had been artificially created and the emotions she actually felt?

What about Pie suddenly appearing in this world as Lucy Lowell?

What about all those coincidences piling together?

Finding the world's residue.

Coming into contact with it.

And obtaining the body of a woman named Lucy Lowell, whose soul had been trapped there long ago.

...Was all of that the Chairman too?

“Ah, Lowell. Your junior really doesn't look well.”

“Yes... I'll calm him down. You can go.”

“...Wait, but why did you ask me for the password to Ingwang's house before? And why did I just obediently tell you? Now that I think about it, that's kind of weird.”

“Magic really doesn't work well here. Should I overwrite it again?”

What was actually real?

Wow.

What a damn mess.

I finally understood Jin's feelings.

I was getting depressed right along with him now.

How had he managed to keep living like that?

Even laughing whenever something funny happened.

You'd need an absurdly tough mind to manage it.

Thinking about it that way, Dorphin really did have a carefree personality.

Was it because he could see the Flow of the world?

If seeing the world's Flow meant seeing fate...

Then what did my fate look like?

A fate bound to the Chairman.

“Hey. Snap out of it.”

“...Haa....”

If something like this had happened inside the game, I probably would have found it entertaining.

I might have even shouted something stupid like,

“I'll destroy that fate!”

But reality really wasn't fun at all.

I wanted to become one of those ridiculously common fantasy novel protagonists who got transported to another world and started showing off.

Something like,

“Ahh, so this is what they call ‘overcoming adversity!’”

“What's wrong with you? Did something happen?”

“A lot happened... Pie, why did you come here?”

If Pie's current existence was nothing more than one of the Chairman's games, how was I supposed to accept that?

If someone created by the man who manipulated me ended up becoming incredibly important to me...

Could I really believe that she had developed feelings for me entirely through her own will?

In other words...

Did Pie truly come to like me because of her own feelings?

And even if she herself believed that...

Could I believe it?

“What do you mean?”

“I met the Chairman today. He told me that everything I've experienced until now was something he did.”

“...What exactly have you experienced until now?”

...Ah.

I'd never told her.

We had gotten tangled up in all sorts of things, and we were both incredibly attached to each other.

Yet neither of us ever talked about ourselves.

Seriously.

“Hmm....”

“What? Say it.”

“Don't you feel way too different compared to how you act at home?”

“You're one to talk.”

Pie had once said she didn't tell people about herself because she hated being pitied after they heard her story.

What about me?

I still couldn't look at my past objectively.

I wasn't mature enough.

And my emotions weren't worn down enough either.

I wasn't some likable protagonist from a movie who could tell a tragic story with clever jokes.

Nor was I the type who could laugh bitterly to myself while acting like the unfortunate hero of some drama.

...Still, if I told Pie...

Wait.

Would Pie's reaction even truly be her own?

Half of Pie existed inside the game.

Couldn't the Chairman interfere with her too?

...No.

Still.

“When I was young, I said something terrible to my parents. That same day, both of them died. I managed to see them right before they passed away, and when they saw me, they apologized.”

Pie was quiet for a moment.

Then she spoke.

“My parents died when I was young too. When I returned to my village, everyone in the village except me had burned to death. I couldn't even hear their final words. There was nothing left except ash.”

I blinked.

“I couldn't easily fit in after I moved somewhere else. My cousin had died from an illness, so I entered the family almost like I was replacing the empty space they left behind.”

“After that, I was sold by the adults who had taken care of me in the village that picked me up. I don't know exactly where they sold me, but it was a strange place where lots of children like me kept dying.”

“...Wow.”

The emotions that had been growing heavier as I talked about myself immediately shattered after hearing Pie's story.

It almost felt like I could smell the burned village.

Like the wind was carrying smoke and ashes straight toward me.

And hearing what had happened afterward made my chest hurt.

Sure, she had technically been a game character.

But that was one hell of a backstory.

Normally, someone with a past like that would play a major role in the story...

Ah.

Right.

She was the Witch of Corruption.

Wait a second.

When you thought about it, wasn't the reason she eventually became known as the Witch of Corruption basically because of me?

The Chairman's "plan" wasn't something like setting a hundred traps and waiting to see which one caught something, right?

“Still, before I died, a knight saved me. He was like a light in the darkness.”

“Uh... hmm....”

“It's okay. You can keep talking.”

Continuing to complain about my life in front of Pie now felt like a child throwing a tantrum.

Look at that calm expression she wore while talking about something that horrific.

As expected of someone with the life experience of a person practically in her forties.

And even afterward, she had lived as a guide.

Then One-Horn chased her down and she lost all her old companions.

After that, she got involved with me, only for that to fall apart before long too.

Then she wandered around for twenty years until she ended up being called by a derogatory title like the Witch of Corruption.

What kind of miserable...

Just thinking about her life made my heart ache.

It was way too pitiful.

“...Hmm. After that, I kept constantly losing people and places I became close to. The two people who took me in also killed themselves while I was away.”

Pie tilted her head.

“I'm jealous. That still means you managed to find people and places you could become attached to.”

...

Okay.

Maybe I should just shut up.

Compared to this former game character, my past was practically cheerful.

If my past was gray...

Then Pie's past was pitch-black darkness.

...I never thought I'd lose the Misery Olympics this easily.

So this was what an otherworlder was like.

Ahh...

So this was "tragedy."

Otherworlders were amazing...!

“Well... anyway. The Chairman said all those things from my past were manipulated by him.”

“That's similar to me too. If you really think about it, my entire life is because of the Chairman as well. Surprisingly, we have a lot in common, don't we?”

“Do we?”

Hmm.

I felt a little more relaxed.

Feeling better after looking at Pie, who had suffered far worse than me, was probably incredibly selfish.

But what could I do?

That was genuinely how I felt.

“...I feel a little better now.”

Pie stared at me.

“You know that's kind of trashy, right? Feeling better immediately after hearing my story is seriously rude.”

“...Teehee.”

“Ugh. Die.”

Hearing Pie's sharp tongue again after such a long time made me breathe out the little air remaining in my lungs.

I closed my eyes for a moment and stopped thinking.

I had probably just panicked and let too many useless thoughts pile up in my head.

After being left completely alone, I had finally told someone about a past I had buried inside myself and never spoken about.

And somehow, I felt better.

Maybe I had been blessed when it came to the people around me.

“...Pie, you probably don't know just how much you mean in my life.”

Pie looked at me.

“You probably don't know either.”

That...

Did that sound a little like a proposal?

How embarrassing.

It still felt too early to put those emotions into words.

So for now, I decided to bury them.

I still didn't know what I was supposed to think about all of this.

It was my first time feeling something like this, which only made it more confusing.

Anyway.

Now that I had calmed down somewhat, I needed to think about what I should do next.

It was only a game, but lately, hadn't I somehow managed to overcome everything that happened there?

I looked at Pie.

“Pie, what do you think I should do to piss off the Chairman?”

The thought of what might happen to me in reality if I truly angered him sent a chill down my spine.

Still, I might as well do something with revenge in mind.

“What the Chairman hates most... The Chairman likes rebellious brats who complain and resist him. But he seemed like the kind of person who hates it when those rebellious brats escape from the palm of his hand.”

“That sounds pretty childish too. Basically, he hates it when things don't go the way he wants.”

“Isn't everyone like that?”

Well...

She had a point.

The real problem was that I still had no idea what the Chairman actually wanted.

Nor did I understand what his plan was.

That made this much harder.

“Hmm... in the end, I guess it's the game....”

Pie stared at me in disbelief.

“How the hell did you reach that conclusion?”

Think about it.

World Gate was something the Chairman had poured a ridiculous amount of effort into creating.

And, arrogant bastard that he was, he had even hidden all sorts of hints inside it.

“There's definitely some direction the Chairman wants things to go. The reason he keeps getting involved with me like this is either because I'm moving exactly the way he expects and he finds that cute...”

I paused.

“...or because he's slowly stacking bricks around me to force me to move in the direction he wants.”

“So?”

“I'll find every hint inside the game, figure out what the Chairman wants, and then do the exact opposite.”

The game's name was World Gate.

Maybe the Chairman planned to use the game as a sacrifice to cross into another world.

Or maybe he intended to create an entirely new world.

Normally, something like that required energy.

And maybe the players were the ones needed to fully charge it.

Or perhaps people were being brought in because the Chairman needed data.

Maybe even his brilliant mind couldn't create a perfect world by itself.

So he needed enormous amounts of data from real people to create a complete world.

Players acting outside his predictions could make the world he eventually created feel far more natural.

They could eliminate inconsistencies he never would have predicted himself.

“The fastest thing that comes to mind is just destroying everything....”

Thanks to what happened in the underground kingdom, flooding places underground had become one possible method.

Thanks to the bamboo incident, mass-producing explosives was no longer impossible either.

And even if humans couldn't supply what I needed, I might be able to procure it from Karantlia.

...In other words, I might currently be the most dangerous terrorist inside World Gate.

And somehow, a guy like me was about to receive the title of Hero.

What a pitiful world.

Actually, it might be more fun to make the overwhelming majority of people my allies first and then bring everything crashing down.

I'd probably need some other method to pull that off, though.

I could think about that later.

“They say an incompetent ally is more frightening than a competent enemy. No matter how strong a fortress is, once it starts rotting from the inside, there's no saving it.”

Pie looked at me suspiciously.

“Why? What are you planning to do to World Gate?”

“Are you attached to it?”

“No.”

Good.

Neither was I.

Honestly, even without World Gate, there were plenty of other games I could play.

I jumped to my feet.

“First goal! Get the title of Hero and gain permission to enter the Maze Forest!”

Pie narrowed her eyes.

“To find my remaining half?”

“To find my half too.”

Standing up like that actually made me feel much better.

Having a goal made everything seem clearer.

And knowing that everything I was about to do was specifically meant to screw someone over?

That somehow made my heart race.

“As for reality, I'll meet Dorphin and Jin and talk to them too. If we're going to screw him over, we might as well do it properly.”

“You talked like you weren't interested before.”

“I'm the kind of person who can create interest whenever necessary. All right! I'm mentally prepared now!”

Saying that the thing I was about to do after going home was merely "playing a game" sounded kind of pathetic.

So let's call it exploring another world instead.

Technically, that wasn't even wrong.

Let's go!

To another world!

And if I have to kill the god of that world...

I'll even kill a god!

Because it's a game!